Dear Climate Therapist: How Do I Protect My Son From Toxic Influencers?

When disillusionment is fertile ground for extremism

A parent wrote in about her 15-year-old son who is sensitive, aware, and lately… slipping into hopelessness. The wildfire smoke, the political chaos, the doomscrolling—it’s all catching up to him. She’s fearful he might be pulled toward toxic and extreme online influencers. She’s not alone. This is a fear I’m hearing from so many parents right now.

Our climate-aware therapist Kyle Hill surfaces something critical: this isn’t just a parenting dilemma. It’s a societal one. Climate chaos and algorithm-fed grievance culture are colliding, and our boys are caught in the crossfire. So what do we do about it? Kyle suggests we raise boys who know how to feel, not fight — boys who can turn despair into connection, not hate.

I’m writing to you as a parent who is feeling deeply alarmed by the rise of online radicalization of boys and young men, especially through misogynistic and authoritarian influencers. A recent Guardian article explored how social media platforms gamify connection and status and how that leaves boys especially vulnerable to radicalization. My 15-year-old son is thoughtful and sensitive. He’s always cared deeply about the environment but after another brutal wildfire season near where we live, I’ve seen his hope dim. I don't think I've heard him call it climate anxiety, but I see how the political chaos and ecological collapse are weighing on him. Could this fear of the future be part of what’s making boys like him more susceptible to toxic ideologies? How do we help our sons find meaning, resilience, and belonging before the algorithms get to them first?

- A Worried Parent

Dear Worried Parent,

This moment has most of us searching for answers, but questions abound. For example, in the US, where I am, how can a misogynistic, bigoted, xenophobic and racist person win the highest office in the Nation, especially at a time when we’ve expended so many resources to recognize the impacts of climate injustice? Personally, I consider the implications of perceived change, sometimes radical change, on the consciousness of a Nation built on pillars of discrimination and racism.

Three months has felt like forever to me. It’s hard to imagine the experiences of young men and boys at this time. We are only months separated from an administration that was developing a green climate corps, to a regime that recruits young people to endorse hateful ideologies and hegemony.

I keep coming back to the idea of an extinction burst—that psychological moment when harmful behavior spikes just before it fades. It’s a known pattern in behavior change: when a system is challenged, it doesn’t go quietly. It resists. It lashes out. And maybe that’s where we are right now, not just with your son, but with the political and cultural forces swirling around him.

In terms of the radicalization you fear, take the story of the 17-year-old Canadian young man who was inspired by incel ideology and fatally attacked a woman at a massage parlor in 2020. The takeaway and reminder from that tragedy is that loneliness + algorithmic pathways + grievance culture = a dangerous combination, especially for young men in search of meaning or a way to process their pain. The mechanism by which he was pulled in—looking for belonging in a time of personal despair—is precisely what many young people today, especially those overwhelmed by climate distress, are vulnerable to. Disillusionment is fertile ground for toxic ideas. And in moments of ecological collapse and political backsliding, the rise of radical, regressive ideologies may very well be the system’s last scream.

But if that’s true, and if this is the extinction burst, then what comes next can be different. And you’re right to wonder: how do we interrupt the pull? The answer in my mind is in the power of connection. The antidote to radicalization is not just information. It’s meaning. Belonging. Emotional fluency. Ecological kinship. We can show our kids that climate despair doesn’t need to collapse into rage or resignation. It can be alchemized into care and solidarity.

I want to believe and trust that love for our planet and for the environment does not disappear so easily. That once the principles of reciprocity, respect and love are learned, they can never be forgotten. What is understood is that the power of social connectedness supersedes so many other value-driven behaviors. This is our challenge then: supplementing our roles as support systems, loved ones, and caretakers with that of connectors. Connectors to the environment, to healthy friendships, to our child’s emotions, and the behaviors that often follow. We must effectively communicate and support the development of kinship beyond material objects, internet addiction and egocentrism. We must lean into ecocentrism to create caring and supportive community systems of mutual aid.

How beautiful does that sound?

Sometimes, we endure, knowing that the teachings of this moment are a scaffold to help us find a new path. I have faith that we are going to come out of this moment stronger together.

- Also, a Worried Parent

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‘Till next time!

>Britt

*Please note: This column offers thoughtful reflections and guidance from a climate-aware mental health perspective, but it’s not a substitute for personalized medical or psychological care. If you're struggling, we encourage you to seek support from a licensed therapist, counselor, or healthcare provider you trust. You don’t have to carry it all alone. For a list of climate-aware therapists and mental health resources, visit our Resource Hub here.