Baby Stuff: A Tender Reckoning

Exploring eco-reproductive concerns and non-dualistic ways of holding the strain

The ache of knowingly bringing children into a world of collapsing ecosystems and dangerous levels of warming that will march onwards with their development is not only a private preoccupation that stirs an individual’s soul and occasionally may put one in the fetal position. It’s a reality that can affect our social experience, impacting connections with romantic partners, friends, parents, neighbours: the whole relational soup in which we are swimming.

I recently found the work of a gorgeous writer and researcher in Tasmania named Gabrielle Feather over at her Substack Holding Both that deals with themes of climate breakdown-aware mothering in a psychologically sophisticated way. As a researcher in what she calls “post-growth psychology”, Gabrielle underscores the need for psychological flexibility and provides guidance on how to achieve this ability to hold both the beauty and the pain of living in these times while nurturing kids through it all. It is indeed possible to tend to our internal turmoil about the palpable wrongness of so very much about modern existence, not turn away from the trouble out of self protection, find ways to act, and simultaneously lean into the truth that a new world is being born in the ashes of the one that’s currently decaying. It’s about trusting that there is soulfulness, meaning, love, and possibility for us - and our kids - on the far side. No answers. Just aliveness to how it all truly feels, and something ancient that lays the path.

Long time readers will know that my newsletter has explored this topic from a bunch of angles over the years. In case anyone is grappling with questions around having or not having bio-kids and/or supporting chosen family and non-bio kin in the planetary health crisis, I’d like to resurface some of our work and favourite pieces we’ve published on this topic before we get into the main part of today’s post.

• The backstory to Gen Dread (my book and newsletter that stemmed from my own eco-reproductive concerns and pain points I experienced before having my son, who is now 3.5 years old)

• Our documentary, The Climate Baby Dilemma

• Parenting beyond the nuclear family

• Don’t want to bring kids into this world? Here’s how to navigate the judgment

• The world’s first course on eco-reproductive concerns

• The colour of climate anxiety (and kid questions)

• A call to action for the grown ups of the world

• The moral duty we have to kids growing up in the climate crisis

I also want to share with you a new theatrical work on the topic.

Baby/Stuff is a new play that addresses whether to have a baby given the climate crisis. Set in Fall 2023, the story follows two couples navigating the end of one life, the beginning of a new life, climate anxiety, our excessive consumption culture, and racial justice. How can they reconcile their friendship, values and parenthood in a world suffering from climate change?

The play’s lead writer is the talented theater artist Marisol Rosa-Shapiro. Former U.S. Environmental Protection Agency enforcement attorney and senior executive, David A. Hindin is the co-author. We recently spoke with David, who is producing Baby/Stuff.

The seeds for this play were planted when he and his wife, while living in the Boston area, were invited to the birthday party of a toddler. They reluctantly bought a small birthday gift to conform to U.S. social norms, and then showed up at the party to see a home overrun with toys (*ahem* the child clearly did not need another). This led David to his research on the root causes of our environmental crises we prefer to ignore, and to his discovery of my book Generation Dread, which deals extensively with eco-reproductive concerns. A summary of David’s research is found in this Rewilding blog post.

If you have friends and family who only talk about their vacations, the kids' soccer games, the annoying bosses, or other safe subjects, this play immerses you in a different social context, as it focuses on controversial topics that need to be discussed but rarely are. The play has four characters: Chris, a Black App developer for the bicycle community and Jo, a white environmental lawyer for a non-profit experiencing climate anxiety, have been close friends since college. Their spouses are now part of the close friendship. Chris’s wife is Dejah, a Black reading specialist and amateur forager. Jo’s white husband, Briar, is an assistant professor of ecological and procreation ethics. Jo views the four of them as her “Zombie Apocalypse pod against the decaying world” who will remain childfree because of the raging environmental crises. The other three characters share this view of remaining childfree, but then things change.

When Dejah tells Jo she is pregnant with some trepidation, Jo does not respond with the automatic response of joy and congratulations. Jo’s response threatens to shatter the friendship. Later this month, if you’re in LA, you’ll have a chance to see how these two couples navigate this rift. It may resonate with you. Race, privilege, ancestral history, perspective – they all come to bear on this breakdown in friendship and beginning of a new kind of life and shared understanding.

If you live in the Los Angeles area, you may see an almost fully-staged workshop production of Baby/Stuff at the Hollywood Fringe Festival on June 21, 22, 28 and 29. Each of the five performances will have an optional audience feedback session and so you can be part of the creative process in bringing a new play to life.

Once complete, Baby/Stuff will be one part of a two-part theater going experience that includes this one-act play, resources to continue to learn and engage on its themes and a facilitated discussion for the audience after each performance. While we have not seen the show, we wish we were in LA so we could catch it. No doubt some of our readers will feel recognized in their concerns by this story about a modern dilemma that is both personal and structural in nature, causes so many young people anger and distress, and impacts their relationships. Let us know what you think of the play if you manage to catch a performance!

And subscribers to this newsletter can get a 20% reduction on the ticket price by entering this code on the Hollywood Fringe Festival ticket page: “FindingPurpose”.

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If you liked reading this, feel free to click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack 🙏🏼

With love,

-Britt