Dear Climate Therapist: Am I losing it, or is the world?

How to cope when the goalposts of ‘normal’ keep moving

There’s a breaking apart happening—not just in political fractures, but in something harder to name: the slow erosion of trust, the disorientation of watching so many people behave as though they don’t possess a basic sense of right from wrong, which way is up, or what’s even real. This week’s Dear Climate Therapist column dives straight into that uncertainty, with two letters from people wondering where the line is between a reasonable response to an unreasonable world and distress that needs intervention.

Our resident climate-aware therapist Caroline Hickman says we need to learn how to name what we’re feeling, to stay present in the confusion, to trust that care is not maladaptive, and that feeling deeply in the face of ‘the end of things as we’ve known them’ is not a weakness, but a kind of wisdom to guide the way.

Now, over to our readers who asked some potent and timely questions, and Caroline’s considered response.

Design by Unthinkable.

Dear Climate Therapist,

How do I know what a "normal" reaction of climate distress is, and when it's more than that? During the first few waves of COVID, I kept brushing off how anxious, angry, and hopeless I regularly felt because I told myself, "who wouldn't be given the pandemic, and ecological crises, and racial injustices, and the rise of fascism, etc."? At some point, my therapist told me that, yes, these are all facts, /and/ I still struggle with my emotions around them to a point where it's maladaptive. I get that framing, but it can be hard to tell when things cross the line.

- Glass Half Empty

Dear Climate Therapist,

The world’s gone mad and even though I was coping ‘ok-ish’ with my climate anxiety, I’m now completely out of my depth with climate anxiety combined with Trump anxiety combined with rise of right-wing ideology anxiety. I thought I was doing ok but tell me how to cope with this!’

- What on Earth?!?!

Dear Glass Half Empty & What on Earth,

I am writing a response to both of these letters together. Hopefully, it is obvious why. It’s hard to know how to judge things at the moment. It’s hard to know what and who to trust. To ‘Glass Half Empty’ I need to say that I’m not entirely sure that your emotional responses are maladaptive; your feelings might be hard to cope with, but they may also be a coherent and congruent response to what is going on. In a world that sometimes seems impossible to make sense of, perhaps we need to recognise that the old ways of making sense just do not work any longer, but that’s not to say that there are not new ways we could learn and stretch too. You say it’s really hard to know when things cross the line, perhaps that is because the line has been moved, repeatedly. And then you are told that it’s not really a line at all.

Think of it this way—maybe we are in new territory and there are no maps, no familiar pathways that we can follow. So, we need to use our wits, our courage and imagination to create new maps to find a way through these unfamiliar landscapes. And find things to trust. Do not let these fears destroy what you know is right and good in yourself and in the world. Yes, it is confusing, but that does not mean you need to get lost in the confusion. Use the things you can trust to build a map. Use integrity, knowing right from wrong, use love and honour and decency and care. Do not allow the panic to create chaos, stay clear and trust yourself.

I am going to suggest that everything that we see developing is an aspect of climate anxiety and distress. Even though it may present as other things, I would argue that these are the symptoms of (maybe unconscious in many people) existential dread and terror that is being enacted in destructive ways. People are driven mad by climate anxiety in many different ways, some can attach their fears to climate and ecological breakdown, but others are acting out their fear and panic and using distractions and deflecting. ‘Let’s create a human conflict over here that we can all get outraged about, to deflect from the world-threatening existential and literal crises that we can’t face, don’t know how to deal with, and that require humility and wisdom to face, because they threaten our illusion of power’. These are all different faces of climate denial.

Don’t fall for it.

See through it, call it out, name it, stay calm, you can call it many things—radical hope, ruthless compassion, stubborn optimism—just do not let your heart get crushed or silenced. It is not maladaptive to feel or to care, you should feel proud that you care.

In solidarity,

Caroline

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‘Till next time!

Much love,

Britt